Throughout my childhood in South West England, my mother suffered from depression. Nowadays they call it bipolar, a crippling mental illness that affects and disrupts the whole family.
In short, I spent my youth walking on tiptoes, afraid to do or say something that would upset my mother and lead her once again to being committed in an institution for several months.
I learned to suppress my thoughts and numb my feelings. Great survival mechanism right? Which child doesn’t want to keep his mother with him? But not without consequences for me as an adult.
The result is that I became Mr. Nice Guy - putting other people’s needs before my own, avoiding confrontation and forever helping other people.
Who am I to have my own voice? And if I speak up, will those people also leave me? Grrr!
Of course I know better now and can reason beyond my old limiting beliefs into more constructive and effective behavior. At least, I like to think so.
The truth is that it takes constant effort. Everyday there are moments when I struggle with the fear of putting myself out there, but I do it anyway. I persevere. I don’t give up. I show up. I introduce myself. I participate. I show myself in my blog.
I believe it’s our job to light up the universe with our own uniqueness and warmth.
The fact is, there never has been, nor never will be anyone who is exactly you or me.
This is our one time. This is it!
It's time to shine your own special light and be more visible in the world.
There are only 4000 weeks in an average life.
What are you waiting for?
Here are 42 ways to be more visible:
#1: Skype instead of calling and have a real FACE TO FACE conversation.
#2: Send a VIDEO message rather than a text message.
#3: Write the positive things you like about a friend in a CARD and send it. Who wouldn’t want receive that?
#4: Start a website BLOG with your favourite quote, weekly highlights, photos and advice.
#5: Why blog when you can vlog. Upload YouTube videos to your blog.
#6: Send a weekly newsletter. Use a free mailing service like Mailchimp.com It’s free!
#7: Send a survey to ask the OPINION of friends and family on current projects or topics you’re working on. Use a survey service like Surveymonkey.com. It’s free too!
#8: Get a life coach or MENTOR to guide you with through your fears of being more visible and exercise the skills to put yourself out there more.
#9: Keep track of your ACCOMPLISHMENTS and feel proud to communicate them to others.
#10: Be more generous with COMPLIMENTS. People like to be around those who appreciate them.
#11: Share your schedule with others and let them know when you are AVAILABLE to get together.
#12: Schedule a RECURRING meeting with friends, family or inspirational colleagues to stay top of mind and help each other on common interests or projects.
#13: Make a Facebook page on a favourite topic and invite our friends to join.
#14: Start a Facebook MASTERMIND group of like-minded people who share your enthusiasm for cooperation and cocreating.
#15: Share interesting ARTICLES.
#16: Share inspirational QUOTES.
#17: Share tips and recommenations.
#18: Repost and retweet content you love or bring a smile to your face.
#19: During presentations, sit at the FRONT ROW in order to engage and immerse yourself more in the topic.
#20: Send your questions in advance to the speaker or even better ask them during the presentation.
#21: At work, REACH OUT to people from other departments to exchange knowledge skills and best practices.
#22: Speak to colleagues face to face occasionally instead of per email.
#23: GET INVOLVED in an event your company or local community is organization.
#24: Meet people at NETWORK events with this awesomely simple tip: “I don’t think we’ve been introduced. My name is…”
#25: At events, INTRODUCE people who don’t yet know each another who share interests and commonalities.
#26: INVITE friends over to dinner and share your struggles and achievements. Offer help and advice.
#27: Arrange a WEBINAR or Google hangout with your friends for real time conversations in the comfort of your own homes.
#28: Use the smart phone app to Periscope to broadcast an event and capture real-time comments.
#29: Make your own YouTube channel. Upload VIDEOS and ask friends to subscribe.
#30: Make a PODCAST using smartphone apps Stitcher or Audello. They’re free!
#31: THANK someone with a personal message of card.
#32: Ask someone for their opinion or advice on a topic you’re working on rather than trying to figure it out on your own.
#33: Pro-actively OFFER TO HELP someone.
#34: RECOMMEND a favourite restaurant, film, book, course etc.
#35: Post a review of a place you’ve visited and share it online.
#36: Make subtle use of CAPITALS in your messages to catch attention and help the reader scan your text easily.
#37: Ask friends what they think are your STRONGEST character attributes.
#38: Include the top character attributes in the the header photo on you social media profiles.
#39: RECIPRICATE the gesture to your friends and send them their top character attributes in your opinion.
#40: In communication, BE PRESENT (not distracted), engage and ask questions.
#41: Be SINCERELY interested in your conversation partner. Add VALUE to by offering suggestions.
#42: When meeting people, follow up with a thank you and how you can HELP in the future.
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What are your own ways to be visible. Leave a reply below, I 'd love to hear from you.
Business Growth Coach
Cover image: the untrained eye